The Zombie’s Guide to Communicating Among the Living

iZombieHere’s the thing about that zombie life: you really don’t want anyone to know about your affliction. There’s a stigma, you know? We’ve spent the last couple of weeks talking about how to keep up appearances in social situations, but what happens when you actually have to open your mouth? Here are some of my tips for appearing as human as possible at all times.

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This should go without saying, but really, you’re not going to want to discuss how much you love to eat brains. In fact, really just stay away from food-related topics altogether – you don’t want to give anyone reason to be nervous. If you must talk about your skin tone, be sure to mention how much healthier being pale makes you – no skin damage here, thank you very much.

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Are you my parents? Then you probably shouldn’t be calling me. Seriously, everyone texts or emails these days. Try to go gentle on the touch screen, though – you don’t want any fingers accidentally falling off in public. Awkward.

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Obv. Duh.

What are your best communication tips for zombies? Let me know on Twitter @SamMaggs and @shomicanada!

And you can catch new episodes of iZombie exclusively on shomi!

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